This week is Valentine’s week, which I know can bring up a lot of emotions in everyone - those who are single, those who are in healthy relationships, those who are in unhealthy relationships, and those who are newly single through divorce or widowhood. It can be a week that means a lot to someone, one that goes by unnoticed, or even one that goes by with unmet expectations. I haven’t been married as long as some of you, and I dare say I’ve probably been married longer than some of you…but if I’ve learned anything in the last 12 years of marriage, I’ve learned that often marriage doesn’t look like what we think it looks like. But I’ve also learned that God wants my marriage to succeed in His plan, and has given me in His word some particular commands regarding my relationship with my husband and how my marriage is supposed to work. Let’s examine some of those!
Bible Verses: Marriage between Man and Woman
As a Christian who believes the Bible is the inerrant word of God and is Truth-with-a-capital-T, here’s what the Bible says about the creation of marriage:
- God created man, and then created woman to be his help meet (helper, supporter): Genesis 2:18, 23 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. … And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
- God joins man and woman together in marriage: Mark 10:6-9 But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
- A man and a woman who are married are partners to each other in labor and life: Ecclesiastes 4:9 Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.
Marriage as a Picture of Christ and the Church
- The unity in marriage is a picture of the unity between Christ and the Church: Ephesians 5:31-33 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
- The Lord’s relationship with us is based on His perfect righteousness, justice, love, mercy, and faithfulness: Hosea 2:19-20 And I will betroth thee unto me for ever; yea, I will betroth thee unto me in righteousness, and in judgment, and in lovingkindness, and in mercies. I will even betroth thee unto me in faithfulness: and thou shalt know the LORD.
Strengthen your Marriage by Being a Man or Woman of God
- Trusting the Lord will provide direction for your individual lives and your mutual life in marriage: Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
- You cannot change anyone but yourself, but changing yourself by becoming more like Christ will have an impact on those around you: 1 Timothy 4:15-16 Meditate upon these things; give thyself wholly to them; that thy profiting may appear to all. Take heed unto thyself, and unto the doctrine; continue in them: for in doing this thou shalt both save thyself, and them that hear thee.
Bible Verses to Strengthen a Marriage
- Husbands and wives need each other and need to cling to each other, emotionally and physically: 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
- Marriage is not about our desires and needs, but about each other: Colossians 3:18-19 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.
- It is good to be married: Proverbs 18:22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.
- Song of Solomon 7:10 I am my beloved’s, and his desire is toward me.
I’m intentionally posting this on Valentine’s Day so that we have a reminder amidst the “Hallmark”-y Valentine's Day cards and treats and things around us that the Lord should be the center of our marriage, and His plan the focus of our marriage. The Lord gave us each other, gave us marriage as a good gift from Him, and expects us to follow His directions for it and our individual lives as we live out our marriages. Sometimes, marriage is happy and pleasant and all roses and sunshine; sometimes, marriage is hard and painful and an uphill battle; but always, marriage between two people who love the Lord is a good gift from Him for our benefit.
For a beautifully written marriage devotional from a lady who has been married longer than I have, and who has lived the happy and the hard parts of marriage, check out this marriage devotional from Mrs. Lori Baxley.
